• There is no eternal bravery...

    I walked down the hall as Emylee and Destiny told me a story about their friend Ryan. Well, Emylee just commented. Destiny talked.

    "What is your problem?" Destiny peered at me. "Are you okay?"

    "Miv wants to get back together with me." I breathed. "I'm seeing him after school."

    Destiny rolled her eyes. "Don't go out with him. He's 16."

    "Ryan is 17, and you have naked pictures of him. ON YOUR PHONE."

    Emylee giggled. "It's true Desty, you do."

    I sighed. "he's a rapist, Miv. I don't like him."

    "He raped you!?" Destiny yelled. "...Was it--"

    "no, it was not fun." I hissed.

    "Sory Angela." She laughed. Emylee nudged Destiny.

    "Whore." Emylee called as we headed to lunch.

    Miv sat on the bed of his apartment. He took a breath, letting it out, and walking back and forth. Another breath, and he stopped.

    "What?" I hissed. "You only like me for my boobs Miv."

    "No, Angela. I don't."

    "Yuuki." I retorted. "I wanna go by Yuuki."

    "Okay, whatever. I love you, please accept it. Why won't you?"

    I looked up as Sakura and Uruha walked in. Kura was short behind.

    "Hey, Miv!" She cheered, and looked at me. "Ange--- i mean, Yuuki!"

    "Kura-Chan!" I called. "Oh, I mean Kura-Sama!" i joked. -Sama means -God. She is not god. Just the guardian of 7 kids. She's only related to one. And that is her sister. The rest? Adopted. Miv, Sakura, Jewel, Koji, Seiji, Riley, and Uruha. Kye and Ed shortly will be adopted. Zerenda (Ze) is her sister. Kura is 27 or 28, so it's okay. The rest range from the youngest, Riley (13 1/2), to the oldest, Miv (16 or 17). And I dont even know if Ze and Kura are blood siblings. All I know is everyone Kura adopted has shitty lives and their parents...

    A) Died.

    B) We're abusive.

    or C) other.

    Lord knows what 'other' is...

    And even he's questioning it.

    Amen.

    Kura embraced me. "I haven't seen you since-- Miv?" She peered at him. "Yuuki?" I smiled when she said that. "Are you back together?"

    "I want to, but she won't." Miv sighed. "My life is only to impress you! Please!"

    "No Miv!" I yelled back. "Get away from me, you stupid b*****d!"

    Everyone went silent as a single tear rolled down his cheek. I turned, walking away. Sakura grabbed my shoulder, but I shook it off, not lending her a word.

    If only I knew what was to come.

    Week or So Later

    I peered at the mail.

    "Junk, junk," I sighed, walking up the driveway as clouds gathered. "Junk... Umm, Bills? And- Miv?" I looked at the letter. "Army, what?" I opened the letter slowly.

    Dear my beloved Angela:
    I am very sorry. A while back, I signed for the military. they just called me
    over, so I have to leave you. I remember the necklace you wnated before when we first went out, and got it for you. I do not know when or if i will be coming back, so until then, goodbye. I love you so much.
    Miv

    I drank the letter, word by word, until tears took over and I fell onto the ground. The silver music note charm fell from the letter as the clouds rumbled and the sky cried with me. I clutched the charm in sorrow, crying hard as it poured onto me.

    A laughing voice sinks in the eardrum a faint temperature is mixed in the midwinter.

    I mailed him. I called Kura, but no one responded. I never took off the necklace, my lovely silver g-clef, single sixteenth note, and one musical measure carved perfectly from silver. In gym, I wear it. in the pool, shower, I wear it. At the gym, I wear it. But I think about it as I lay on the floor of my room, looking at the picture of Miyavi he drew for me as we we're first going out. To the side, the picture read: To my beloved Angela. Forever may we be together. Dear My love, from Miv. I lay, listening to the Miyavi song Dear My Love.

    the song shuffled to Taion, by the GazettE. the first words... A wintry sky and the broken streetlight cold wind. I thought. Why Miv?

    After the first chours, I misheard the lyrics: 'there is no hand for preparing' for 'there is no eternal bravery'.

    I then sighed, and burst into tears. No, there is no eternal bravery. At least he's strong, I thought the lie. He'll live, over and over and over I thought it.

    Suddenly, Taion and the teary cry was drowned under music from Malice Mizer. Au Revior? No, it was Le Ciel. That was Kura's ringtone.

    I picked it up. "Hello?"

    "Please check the mail." She sounded strained and sad. "I can't tell you over the phone." A long silence, and she hung up.

    I trotted down the stairs, Looking at the empty house. The mail was already on the counter, a letter noticably sitting on the side. I picked it up. the return adress was a forwarded, it looked like, from a military or something.

    Damn.

    I ripped it open, reading it slowly. Two words stuck out: bullet wound. So he's okay. I was relaxed, then read the next three words: to the head.

    I fell down, looking at the five words in anger and sorrow. No, Miv, there is no eternal bravery.

    Please tell me it is a horrible dream. I shouted many times with losing voice

    As I left school, my phone rang. I peered at it. "uruha" it read.

    "Hello?" I picked up.

    I couldn't understand him through the muffles and yells of students running out. One more day of school. Craziness.

    "Uruha, louder." I called.

    "Can you come to the funeral?"

    Not to lose for living.

    The words from taion rang as I cried slowly. yes, I wanted to say, please.

    My strained voice spilled. "No," Slithered from the corner of my lips.

    "Well, Kura wants you, me, Kye, Sakura, and everyone else to play at his funeral. what song should it be?"

    "Taion," I spat. "GazettE."

    Silence. "umm, why?"

    "There is No eternal bravery." I smiled.

    uruha tried to reply, but didn't. "I'll give you the tabs."

    "I want to sing it."

    "I'll give them to you anyway. You can wear one of Sakuras dresses."

    "Thank you Uruha." I cried.

    "Meet me by highland Villages' theater." he replied. "4:30"

    "I'll be there." And I walked to highland village slowly.

    How much should I shout, writhe and suffer?

    "So, you can go?"

    "I'll think about it." Uruha wore his skinny jeans and a black tank, which confused me, and distraced me from his voice. I'd only seen him in shorts.

    "Okay, listen. I'm sorry. I wish I could-"

    "Oh uruha!" I fell into his arms. "Why did he die!? Miv, please come back! I don't want you to die! Please!"

    Uruha held me close, crying too. "It's okay," he calmed. "Everything will be fine."

    I felt safe in his arms, everyone passing us watching as I cried.

    uruha pulled me away. "Please, will you go?"

    "I don't want to. I just, Uruha, the last thing i said was that he was a b*****d! What must he think of me!?"

    He kissed my head. "calm down." He muttered. "I need to go, but-"

    "Don't leave me!" I cried. "I need you! Please!"

    Carefully, he once more calmed me. "I'm sorry." he sighed.

    Kura drived me home, and the whole way I cried, leaning on Uruha's shoulder. I lived 10 minutes driving from Highland Viallage, but I managed to fall asleep. It felt odd, because Uruha and I we're exes, but now just friends.

    "we're here," Kura sighed. "Angela, wake up."

    "yuuki," I muttered.

    Uruha looked at me in the eyes. "You can make it through this. Please remember all I told you, and i will see you soon, okay?"

    "okay," I sighed, and Uruha quickly pulled me to him, kissig me carefully. I felt myself blush, but did not respond to his lips. When he pulled away, he hugged me.

    "I love you," He muttered.

    I didn't realize the words escaped me until they did. "I love you too..."

    Kura clapped. "Come on, get out. I have to be somewhere."

    "Sorry," i looked up at her. "Remember; we're playing taion at the funeral."

    She nodded, and Uruha kissed my head. I blushed at him, leaving the car.

    Please forgive my dying breath.

    I hung the pictures on my wall as the ipod rang from song to song. I was smiling, singing along to 'Nyappy In the World 3' and 'Namida no Ondo'.

    "It is cheesed with the power..." I sang to Silly God Disco. "And the mortality of which it.." I noticed some sketchbook papers I wanted to hang up. I looked through the stack, and as I finished, the song switched to a familiar tune. taion. the picture was Miyavi, one Miv drew for me.

    "This is for you," he handed me back my sketchbook. "This drawing. Now whenever you look in your sketchbook, there it is!"

    The side of the picture read in Miv's pointy font: To my beloved Angela. Forever may we be together. Dear My love, from Miv. I smiled at the picture.

    "I love you," he leaned close to me.

    "Dido," I laughed. "I love you too."

    He was telling the truth. Was I?

    The part of the song came. 'There is no Eternal Bravery'.

    I felt tears fall, and I moved the picture. i couldn't mess it up. When I slowed my breathing, I stood to hang the picture on my door, in the middle of my very-hated messed up Twilight poster. (Right on Edwards face).

    "You really screwed up Miv." I smiled in sorrow. "next time, do this all better. Die after I say my feelings."

    The last day was ringing in my mind.

    He was alive for seventeen years, the long years he lived would hav ebeen better. he was sweet, a very good musician. At piano, guitar and vocals, he was truly great. he was always there for us, all his friends. Only now I found his name. Daisuke Naoki Hatoyama, or Miv as we called him. he can never be forgived, only loved. His true love was not music though, it was her. the authorv of this letter. I could not be here, but miv, I honor you. Will I recover? Who knows. Lets pray. I only hope your in heaven, watching me cry, pray, and mourn. i hope you know I loved you too. There is no eternal bravery. Amen, Love Angela... Yuuki.

    Uruha read my speech yesterday at the funeral. I smiled at the picture on my wall.

    I would never see his face.

    hear his voice.

    his laughs, his cries.

    Never would he smile, would he laugh, and now he drowns in our words.

    He drowns in all.

    But I drown. Drown alone. he was there for me always, but now he cannot be.

    I will never talk to him again. Never. How does that feel? that depends on your mood.

    "You just don't fit in, do you?" I trie dto fix the picture on the poster. "there is no eternal bravery, Miv. Good job."

    I was drowned in the night when I feared and had a dying voice.

    this is all a true story. Today was the day that I hungup the picture on my door, yesterday was his funeral. I wrote this while listening, over and over, to Taion. uruha went to a memorial service for Miv, where they played songs for him, suxch as Taion, Distress and Coma and Burial applicant by the gazettE. The drummer is Kye, when he sings backup drums is Kura. Amadeus (Riley-a girl) is dual guitar, Koji on main. Jewel on female death vocals and melody voxcals. Seiji on metal male vocals andmelody male vocals, Sakura on Violin and other classical insturments and main female vocals. Zerenda (ze) on bass, uruha and I on overall main vocals for gender. uruha and I on backup guitar, if needed. Jewel on backup guitar, also. jewel also plays band insturments (flute, trombone, etc.). This is also in memory of Amadeus's fallen sister katlyn (died in 2004), Kye's fallen brother Ed (died In april 2009), Maiya (died in 2006-2007?) and the main and final, Daisuke.

    Daisuke Naoki Hatoyama-Miv-, June 3rd 1993 through May 24 2009. Underaged (17?) and under a different name, he signed for the military only to impress the one he loved, me. My final words to him were that he was a stupid b*****d, and he still loved me. I do always wear the necklace, I am as we speak. Born in osaka JP, died unknown? Piano, Vocals and guitar. He was talented, buried in dallas. I missed the funeral. I couldn't go, I was too sad.

    Miv, There Is No Eternal Bravery.

    I love You.

    I want to smile again at last...