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Your mistakes are locked in your heart.
Deny they exist and they leave
but no,
I will never let you forget.
Playing games is my one joy
and you,
an impressionable child in the eyes of Time,
delight in playing my games.
Poor soul,
you know not this inner demon
I almost pity you.
But pity is not in the nature of demons.
Gladly will I greet the day,
When drowned in your grief, you finally see
that this demon inside you
Is me.
- by Kitty_Katastrophe |
- Poetry And Lyrics
- | Submitted on 02/03/2009 |
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- Title: Poor Fool
- Artist: Kitty_Katastrophe
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Description:
I wrote this poem for a creative writing group that I'm in. I'm not much of a poet (I usually stick to fiction), but I thought I'd try my hand at it. I know it's awful, but please bear with me.
Let me know what you think! Leave comments, not just ratings. And I like criticism, not praise. (Not that I expect it.) Praise does nothing to help me improve.
Thanks! - Date: 02/03/2009
- Tags: regret mistakes pity demons
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Comments (7 Comments)
- sublime_necromancer - 05/20/2009
- THIS PIECE DRIPS OF GENIUS! I was really sold by your use of metaphor and the way that it had an interesting chaotic flow to it but at the same time, conjured up imagery really well! 5/5!
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- Kitty_Katastrophe - 03/02/2009
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Yeah, I know that it's missing something, but I'm still puzzling over what it is. And I don't really want to lose the pattern that I have, so I'm being sort of stubborn...
Thanks! - Report As Spam
- Inyuashi 23 - 02/08/2009
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The image it paints is quite wonderful, but in my book it's a bit short..
Hmmm...I may just have to do a response to this one... - Report As Spam
- Kitty_Katastrophe - 02/06/2009
- Thanks!
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- Hollands - 02/05/2009
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Well I like it =)
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- Kitty_Katastrophe - 02/03/2009
- Wow, thank you so much!
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- Starlight_Miss - 02/03/2009
- Wow! I love it! *favorites it* 5/5 please rate back.
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