Suicide

• Artist: anutaka
• Description: about someone who commits suicide and then about how someone very attached to the person who committed suicide is effected
• Date: 02/06/2010
• Tags: suicide

They slit their wrists,

They took the pills,

They took a leap,

Took a pistol from Daddy's drawer.

They couldn't take it any more.

The blood drips down the walls,

It gushes out the fatal wound,

I hope someone gets there soon.

They left a note explaining why they aren't there any more.

Someone, someone pushed them to the brink,

Now you always drink.

You blame yourself for not preventing it,

But how could you have when you were never there.

Whispers consume the town, talking, talking,

There is no sacred ground.

It sinks in, they are gone,

Snatched by Death's greedy hands.

He takes what he wants and leaves a disaster.

Comments

[anutaka]

i have to thats y i wrote it

[ExplodingPlastic]

i have attempted suicide thats kinda how my mom said she felt... 5/5

[Fredella]

I really like this. The other day I finish reading a story full of suicide attempts... This poem makes me remember it again, such a sad story... I think the last part of your poem could be better, could be more dramatic perhaps? smile Anyway, can you please comment & rate back?

http://www.gaiaonline.com/arena/writing/poetry-and-lyrics/vote/?entry_id=100007882#title

http://www.gaiaonline.com/arena/writing/poetry-and-lyrics/vote/?entry_id=101764783#title

Thank's! ^_^

[Alexanderpia]

so true. 5/5. I love it!
Although I've noticed that if I needed to give constructive criticism, it'd be how "death took them"- you could always switch it up, and, thinking about suicide, say they were willing to be with him. wink

[anutaka]

awww thanks

[BatzLove]

that is a very true situation.
5/5
that was still nice as any other poem i have read. the best depressing one.