This is a copy from my journal. I took some of it out and change around it. I dont want to make long but it familiar to my journal... ( Wish i could sent this letter....)
March.14 2011
Its been months since i've been despression...Lately i tried to get over it and move on but a song played in my head. It brings me old memories back...I cant stop thinking about it. I missed it so much. It was the only memory i could happily smile. I felt like it was a mircale to see myself happy. But now...its gone...i can't do anything about it. Everything is different...so is everyone. I missed how all my good friends go online and hang like normal days. I missed the laugh, the smile, the day, the love, the friendship...everything. If i get over it, it wont be the same. It will feel like im missing something....Something..important? Who knew...Everyone wants me to get over it but there something that wont let me get over it..I dont know what is it, however. I felt like I wont get over it...What has stopped me from this mistake i've done?
I always want to say I am sorry to my beloved person. Hes everything to me. No matter how much he had done wrong, i will believe he will learn his mistake. I dont want to hurt him or anything. I want to help him and protect him with all my heart. I believe i could change him to a best man in the world. The good thing its not playing his name but there a voice in my head says my name over and over again that i cant figure it out who... Somehow i cant think because of him. I always watch him from his heart. I want him to smile everyday, every season, every moon cycle..even if it hurt my heart and my smile. All i want to say is I love you from all my life.
But its hard to face him..I think he wont feel the same as i am...i dont know what to say...All the things i do like forgetting about you was a LIE! It was a lie. I didnt mean to. I did that so i could move on and find myself who i am. but now i'm hiding everything so you see how my feelings are. Im not happy right now but i dont care how mistake you have done as long you learn it. I cant face you because you may hurt me again however I still love you. I understand if you dont feel the same as i am but i have this feeling ever since the first day i met you and i still have it. Why wouldnt I? You wouldnt be reading this if i didnt tell you how much i love you so much that i cant throw our presicious memories.
I will always love you forever even if it hurt me. I wont stop loving you. I care about you. Your everything to me.. You may have taught me this way but like i said, I will be at your heart
Always and forever...
 I-MissKabbii01-I · Tue Mar 22, 2011 @ 04:58am · 0 Comments |
