Feeling :: smile
Yay! A small victory for me as I managed to get 1K in for today. ^^ Actually, if I hadn't earned a bit more than 2K yesterday, I wouldn't have reached 1K. Perhaps, "yay! I earned 3K this weekend!" would be better. :3
Earning 3K makes me realize that unless I'm questing, I'm stagnant on Gaia. Even questing for someone else, such as when I saved up for the Official Quest Guild or simply to give out donations, didn't amount to much. I only do well when I'm going for myself. While I like to help other people out, it's apparent that I lose interest in being on Gaia and trying to reach a certain amount of gold if other people are my reasons for questing. I can only do well when it's for myself.
And I don't think it's a bad thing. Being able to earn 3K (2K in one day!) has shifted my view of questing. If I can do it without owning a shop or shifting through the Marketplace and Exchange forum, then others should be able to, too. Now there are flaws with this belief, such as having phone line connections, slow downloading/response, and other things that are only vaguely in my head because I have a good computer and a good Internet connection.
However, over the past week, I've had limited time in the mornings to be on Gaia. It's amounted to about 2 hours (if I get up early enough) and even though I have two avatars, I can only be on one (unless I manage to borrow a computer 10 blocks away, but even then, I'm still on one avatar because the other is simply sitting, doing nothing). If I remember right, I have been able to earn 500 gold, if not the majority of it, in the morning. (The evenings are wasted for some reason.)
This reflection has twisted my perception of questing, especially when it comes to new (and n00b) Gaias pleading and begging for gold because the item they want is 1,850 (as an example). I say twisted because I remember being new and not very comfortable with saving up 1,000 gold, not alone close to 2,000. Heck, if I had 500 gold, I thought I was rich.
Nowadays...it's so close to being like nothing to me that I find that scary. I will be so crippled should there be another gold glitch. Right now, I'm doing well off polls. Literally. I line up 10 polls and bammo! I have 100 gold. Line up another 10 and there I go: another 100 gold. If I took yesterday and compressed out all the time that I spent doing other things, I could have made 2K in 1/8th of the time. To earn that much that quick while people make threads begging for donations to buy a low-priced store item makes me want to shake those people. But doing so would give them Shaken People Syndrome and I wouldn't want that.
But the cringe I feel every time I stumble on to a thread begging for gold donations with the crying emoticon or saying, "I have only 80 and I need to buy this item, which is 1,200" is rotten. Yup, rotten. Why? Because I've already calculated how long it would take me to save up the item's worth in days and I see no point to them begging for gold. None. They can do it themselves without help. What's up with the begging when it's obvious to me that the amount can be reached? Now that's the rotten part. My brain is doing the math and the planning, scoffing and cringing at these (pathetic) people, while my heart is saying virtually the opposite.
Yet, when I stop working towards myself, my heart isn't as loud any more. My braining isn't calculating and planning any more. Well, it is a bit, but really, I'm not into it. I like helping people and donating gives me a good feeling, but I don't seem to be motivated by that. When I come across people who are questing for items that are trivial to me (yet they wouldn't have been so many months ago), I close up, regard their begging as pathetic and leave.
Inconsistent, I guess.
I am so bizarre when I haven't enough sleep, but I think I've stumbled upon something that would be interesting to chew on for a little while.
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Pixel Dreams and Memories
Travels around Gaia, ambitious quests, and everything inbetween!
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