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"The Love Heptagon Story"
read this very long story me and my sis made up
if you don't understand the story...oh well, you just don't know how me my friends and others are, here where i live, and at school,...but read it if you want...cause it's funny
this story is dedicated to a really great friends...diovi, yeah, that's right, i'm teasing her, lol
oh, and please excuse me for my language, it's not how i am, i don't even swear, i just added it to make it sorta funny

here you go....





it's during the summer...so diovi goes to the beach...and then see *blink blink* there...half naked......and he's checking her out with her bathing suit on, like..."diovi...you're looking good today..."......then he'd be saying "do you want to go out...you know, swim for a while..."...and they'd be both blushing...and she'd say..."ummm.."...nervous, she tries to throw sand into his eyes

but it was too late...because by the time diovi even sees him...or even reach down to bend and snap the sand from the ground...blinker would be right in front of her eyes...hoping not to blink of course so he wouldn't miss a second of how gorgeous she look..... he embrace his hands around her.......and then ducky comes into the picture...(oh my)...and ducky would be like "get your hand of her, she's mine!!!" and blinker would be like "hell no!!!...i got her first" they'd start a really huge cat fight...and then she'd go "STOP!!!...i can only choose one..." and then they'd be staring at her waiting for your response...she open her mouth to say who it is...

she opens her mouth to say his name...blinker and ducky are staring at her drewling, hoping it's them....she say, "i choose..."...their eyes get bigger....then there's a familiar voice that says, "diovi, hey..."...they all turn around, and there he is....she says "takeuchi?" confused why he's here, but blinker and ducky doesn't know that she's confused, only thinking why she chose him.... takeuchi says..."hey diovi, how ya doin'?....you look hot today!"...he nods his head and searches his pockets for his "digital camera"...and he goes, "ok, diovi, you're a tiger in the woods...make it happen"...she's there blushing...and blinker and ducky are both flabbergasted....they both say at the same time..."takeuchi?...you'd rather stay with him than me?"...they both brake into tears....she says, "wait, no"...she looks around confused...as three pairs of eyes wait for her reaction...dundundunnnnn...
(internal dialogs:takeuchi? ducky? blinker?...who to choose?)


to be continued......................


so she's there trying to get her head straight, and calming everyone down of this disastrous perfect situation to choose the right guy for her...she say, "this is too hard,"...then takeuchi speaks up, saying, "we can have a challenge..." they all look at diovi because they think it's a perfect idea, and she says, "ok...hmmm...challenge...let's have a dance challenge!!"...ducky steps up, "i'll go first, doivi, i hope you're watching this, this is just for you" he points his finger at her and starts licking his dry lips, but it's too dry, so blinker hands him his strawberry lip bolm, her favorite, of course...ducky starts to brake dance for 30 seconds, and she's there hyperventilating because of his beautiful body...and then it's blinkers turn, and he decides to slow dance with her, and keeps whispering in her ear "i "looovvee" you"...and she's there dazzled and flattered, she hyperventilate more...and then it's takeuchi's turn, and he's hyperventilating because he can't dance for S**T, (lol)...and he starts crying, and runs all the way home......there were three and now there are two.......ducky and blinker, waiting for the next challenge...she says, "the next challenge will be...."....dundundun....

to be continued......


she say " the next challenge will beeeeeeeeeee..."...blinker and ducky are staring at her, hoping it's something effortless for them...she trail off...then says, "but first, because this is such a hard decision, i'd like to bring a special guest..." both boys are confused..."the special guest today is....please special guest, will you come out now from behind the bushes"...special guest steps out...with his adidas shoes and black clothing from top to bottom, along with his red jumpsuit apparatus jacket draped around his shoulders, and he walks to diovi while continuously flipping his gorgeous black hair, tripping, because it's poking his eyes..."F**k..get your a** over here faster sad one!" she yells....he starts to cry, "fine, you're so mean, gosh!"... blinker is in rage for what sad one said to her, "oh, shaddup!!!" he says...." they start fighting, "everyone calm down!!!" diovi yells at the top of her lungs, everyone is silent...."so on we go...the next challenge will be...."


diovi says "ok, the next challenge will be....but first, blinker, apologize to sad one, now because look at him!!"...blinker looks at sad one,"what?...he's ugly like always"...diovi slaps blinkers face and leaves a painful hand mark on his face, "shut yo mouth!!, you F**kin ruined his damn beautiful face!!"...she slaps him again, "apologize now, or there will be no challenge, and ducky wins."...blinker gets sassy,"fine then mary...sorry sad one"...sad one gives him a stink face and gives his gay pose, "whatever!" he says and waves his hand around with a pink handkerchief in his hand...she go on "now that every thing's ok, the challenge will be swimming, yall understand me now?...i will be flying a plane to the Philippines, and you will have to swim there to get me"...ducky wipes his mouth from all the drool hanging there from always keeping his mouth open and says, "k, so why is sad one even here?"..."let me finish you dumb a**!!" diovi yells at him...."he's here to make sure that none of you cheats, isn't that right sad one?"...'yes ma'am"...she slap his butt, "good boy, i've taught you well"..."oh, and did you get their uniforms for me dear?"..."yes i have darlin, they're right here" sad one says....he starts to strip his clothes until the only thing on him is his one and only superman spedo with the other two spedo's attached to his..."good boy" she slap his butt again, "k girls, grab a spedo, don't fight"...blinker and ducky gets excited because it's such a wonderful uniform...they start to strip everything off, sad one covers diovi's eyes, but she can't stand to not look, so she peeks between his skinny bony fingers, and you starts to hyperventilate more...apparently, it's too small, but it makes her hyperventilate even more because it shows all their perfect wonderful, beautiful, gorgeous, pretty, nice, curves of their bods..."wooo!!...you're all gonna send me to the hospital if you're still here, let's begin the race"...they all stand at the shore while she hold a flag to begin the race..."everyone ready?"...all at the same time "yes!!" she say, "ok, i'll be waiting...ready, steady, banana.....go!!!"...the race begins


so the race begins, but she's not even finished with her sentenced that she have just started...as it goes "ready, steady, banana....go!!??...what are you doing here?"...the boys are at the shore and hearing from diovi's surprise, they stop and turn...but then sad one stumbles and falls face down on patricks rocks that happens to be washed up on the shore as it punctures his not anymore beautiful face along with the sand filling up his mouth with the disgusting urinated, feces polluted water gouged in his mouth, but no one really cares for what has happened to him as all the faces are turned to GO..."big foot? what are you doing here?" she starts to blush as everyone gets jealous...big foot says"oh, just stopping by, you know a little walk around the beach, to check out the chicks...i think i've already found one"...she start to blush and says"oh stop it" and gives him a little nudge nudge wink wink...he gives her a disgusted look, "what the F**k you talking about homie?...i'm talkin about my juliet!!...my one and only sad one"...big foot runs off to sad one imagining running through wild flowers, "sad one...juliet? what's wrong?"...sad one hides his face"don't look at me!! i'm hideous!!!"...he starts to cry...then there's this voice from behind the bushes going "dirty mouth?"...everyone turns as einstein comes out,"dirty mouth sad one?...it's all right, it's ok...something something, anyways...the research that i've been doing for the past hour has brought me to a conclusion that new orbit white, berries and cream, will give you a good clean feeling no matter what!"...everyone is ecstatic, but sad one's still in his world of drama....sad one goes, "never mind....i see no point in living if i can't be beautiful"...big foot is in rage" what are you talking about!!??....i've never been beautiful in my entire life!!!" big foot dances over to diovi snatching her A-K 47 and kills himself...."ROMEO!!!"...sad one yells at the top of his lungs but it's too late, big foot is dead and sad one can't live without him so he kills himself, too...diovi's there not caring much, she's annoyed because she has no one to watch the two boys race, and starts to grumble...in the far off distance, they all hear a loud monkey...they all look around until she spots little foot swinging from tree to tree and lands in front of diovi with his leopard skin spedo...she say, "tarzan?"...he looks at her confused, "no,...me little foot, you diovi"..."yeah whatever..so are you gonna take over that stupid sad ones place or what? cause you can leave, the hell with you!"..."nonono...i here to serve cousin"..."ooohh, ok..., so let's just begin, i'm getting tired of this drama"...they all walk to the shore, blinker and ducky gives eachother the finger, blinker says, "you'll never win you doodoo head cootie queen"...ducky gives blinker two fingers, "who you callin a cootie queen you lint licker!!!"...again with the drama, diovi's infuriated, "i said to f**kin shut you damn mouth B**ches, one more word out of your mouths, it's all done and i get to go with him," diovi point at einstein still standing over sad one and big foot's body trying to shove orbit gums into their dirty mouths now covered in blood....blinker and ducky are in shock, and now trying to be more cooperative, she goes on, "ok, oh yeah, forgot, you only have 3 days to come and get me...so everyone ready, steady, and i don't mean big foot anymore....so swim like the dolphins my precious angels, run, like like, something something, the hell with it....GO!!!" the race begins and she go to the airport to fly to the flips


diovi's flying to the flips, and blinker and ducky are swimming to her so they can win her heart...little foot, who is riding with the dolphins are watching them...they are both in a tie so they start to splash water at each other to slow each other down...after one day they get really hungry, unexpectedly, an island emerges from the horizon, swimming their way towards it reminding them of you waiting for them at the other end...they get to shore as they search the land for food...little foot is happy because he has a place where there are trees to swing...everyone searches, but there is no food, starving, they decide to work together to catch some fish...little foot and ducky catch the fish as blinker makes a fire...looking through the trees for twigs, blinker spots a couple of bottles hidden..."hey, look what i've found!"blinker yells at them and they come prancing to him, "oh look, i guess jack and miss.swan has left us some rum!"ducky says,"let's drink shall we"...at the end of the day, they're stuffed and wasted and start dancing ddr around the fire making tribal noises and clapping their hand...they hear rapping coming from the bushes...they look and out of nowhere, einstein comes out and starts rapping his emo rap...they begin to cheer along..."omg...my teeth is so disgusting..i can still taste the guts of the fish, dammit blinker, you didn't cook the fish good, what have you been doing at ms.k's class?" ducky yells at him..."i've been staring at diovi, she looks so beautiful when the sun shines in her face, making her glisten like the stars, i hate nathan, he's always getting the good of her, damn him, i hope he goes to hell!!"blinker replies.....einstein stand up"well ducky, i have a solution to your problem...new orbit white, strawberry and cream will give you a good clean feeling, no matter what!"..."Omg, i want one!!"blinker and ducky says at once, einstein looks at them with a twinkle in his eye, "if you want one, come and get one!"..."you are so bad!" blinker says..."i know, but i just can't resist!" ducky says...they chase each other waiting for the sun to set, but it begins to rain..."eintsein, it's so cold" blinker says..."if we huddle together, maybe we can get warmer to produce body heat" einstein says..."you are so smart!...i never thought of that!" blinker says...they huddle together as darkness falls....................
"huuuhhhhuuu...ouch, it hurts!!"ducky yells and blinker, little foot and einstein still huddled together go to ducky..."what's wrong?"little foot asks...ducky is in tears, "my s**t, it won't come out, it hurts so badly"he cries in pain..."it's all right, it happens to everyone," they all nod their head..."no, you're wrong....this is big, i mean really really big...it's gonna tear my a** crack open!"ducky says..."i have a solution!" einstein says,"get on your stomach, stick your butt up and spread your legs,"..."ok"ducky says and does what he's told..."ok, blinker my b**ch, go fetch some water...little foot, with all your arm muscle, i need you to massage his back downward to help the doodoo come out,"einstein says...they all do as said,"ok ducky, i need you to breath in breath out breath in for luck, because you might not make it, k, ready, and PUSH!!! PUSH!!!" einstein yells at ducky as ducky follows...by the end of the day, he survives the most brutal day of his life, giving birth to pea size doodoo...the second day wasted too much time, they start to swim again without making anymore stops...leaving einstein at the island who is still observing ducky's s**t...........

"i wonder if the boys are all right"diovi says, einstein comes up, "they're all fine, i just visited them, they even left me a little present to give to you,"..."ahhh, the second day, they only have tomorrow until they show up, i wonder who it will be".........*nudge nudge wink wink*.....................



"einstein, will you do something for me?"diovi asks, "of course i will, you know i will, i will do anything for you," einstein says, she start to blush, "good boy," she says and start to slap his butt a couple of times because it's just so beautiful as she keeps her eyes on it watching it jiggle like jello ..."i want you to watch over them for me"she says, "as you wish my lady"before einstein goes, she grabs his hand, impossible to stop, she start to slap his butt more..............................
"you will never win you mothaf**ka!"blinker yells, "go dig a whole and bury yourself in it you low life son of a b**ch!"ducky yells back, they're still at a tie, until hypothermia steps in for ducky making him get numb, and he starts to gag on water, eventually, he dies and sinks to the bottom of the ocean floor, "yay!!! that means i win!!"blinker yells at the top of his lungs, "well actually, no."little foot says, "what do you mean? ducky's dead, i win!"blinker says in confusion and anger, "miss diovi has given me specific instructions that the winner will be the person who "comes" to her first, then you will be able to claim her hand"little foot explains, "S**t!!!, but...what if i die, and you survive?"..."oh, you know"little foot says with a sly smile across his face *nudge nudge wink wink*, "but you're her cousin!!"blinker yells in disgust, "that doesn't stop me or her"little foot says happily, "ugh!!you're disgusting!!"blinker yell and they start to cat fight, but because of all their meowing, they attract a tiger shark who is attracted to them, but she has to choose only one, seeing blinker vigorously blinking, winking, and twitching, she thinks that he's trying to get her attention to choose him, so she does and brings him down so they can make half human half shark babies....little foot is excited as he rushes over to diovi, then beyond him, he sees a volley ball floating towards his way, "Wilson? OMG, it's Wilson!!" little foot takes wilson and makes him his new best friend who encourages him to keep swimming, just keep swimming so he can take her with him, almost to the shore, he feels a little tugging at his feet, looks down, and see the little mermaid, ariel, who takes him to the deep so she can have him to herself......
"diovi, i'm back"einstein says, "ooh, so what has been happening, is there someone who will be coming for me?"she asks, "unfortunately, they're all gone."einstein says happily, "gone?"she asks, "yes, ducky has died from hypo., blinker was taken by a tiger shark, and little foot was carried away by ariel."he replies, "ariel that stupid B**ch, i knew she was gonna do that, oh well, i only have one more i guess" *nudge nudge wink wink* "come over here you big hunky chunky chocolate cookie" diovi say, "oh my precious angel from the heavens above, come forth, and i will make thee a joyful bride!"...she starts running towards him...then she hear a faint humming, and she stops in your tracks, the humming and gagging of the mucus gets louder, until the person making the humming jumps out of the bushes and stands right in front of her..."you no hungry for cookie, you hungry for HOT POCKET!!!hot pocket,"hmm hmm says, "you freak!, what are you doing here?" diovi ask with her face getting hot red with blush, "oh just walking around giving out my hot pocket over some useless things,...do you want one?"hmm hmm ask, "i don't want hot pocket" she says, then very slowly and sexily she points at him while pronouncing every syllable, "i want you!" she says and start licking her lips," then she look at einstein, "the hell with you!!!"she say to him as he burst into tears and skips all the way home, "diovi" "hmm hmm" "diovi" "hmm hmm" "spongebob"...they embrace each other and start to make out as they head for an abandoned home, both stepping in, but before closing the door, diovi sticks out her head with a wide smile on her face and says, "it's pleasure you can't measure," *nudge nudge wink wink*...and the door closes..........


THE END


writer: ileanodwal
ideas:ileanodwal
assistant writer and ideas:pu4fish

characters:
diovi - hot, smexy girl who the guys are after (lol)
takeuchi - the weird, annoying, perverted teacher in social studies class
big foot - tall(est?) guy with funny eyes
blinker - has a blinking problem
little foot - smallest guy in the group
sad one - the depressed looking one, but still the better looking one
einstein - smartest person (i'm smarter than him)
ducky - skinny, awesomness breaker with duck-like lips (kinda)
hmmm hmmm - creepy guy who sings about diovi continuosly *shivers*



ok, diovi, i'm happy now

for others who read this long story that (above) have made up *claps* for you...but if you don't understand....oh well


and if i did/do make a video out of this, like the 5th grade movie that me and my friends have made about this killing old lady (me) (good days),....the ending song would be "happy people by skoop on somebody"
(you'd understand why i chose this, if only you knew....)....


other songs that would be included:
*i'm not okay - my chemical romance
*foxtrot uniform charlie kilo - bloodhound gang
*closer - nine inch nails
*everything's magic - angels and airwaves
*wouldn't it be nice? - beach boys
*road to joy - bright eyes

i think that's it...