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idk. lately, i have been having thoughts about running away and starting a new life. my life right now is a little bit screwed up. i definately screwed up in school. i have low grades and i skipped class. i have got like 4 or 5 detentions. i'm trying really hard to bring the grades up. i feel like such a disappointment to everyone i have met. i feel like i let them down. idk why or how. i just feel that way. i also feel like a huge disappointment to my parents. i feel like i let them down too. i'm trying super hard not to hurt myself. it's important that i dont hurt myself in any way. although, some of my friends said that they'll hurt me if i continue to hurt myself. i'm not doing it for them. i am doing it for myself so that i can live a happier life. i am also depressed. i have been struggling with depression for quite some time now. if i seem happy, i'm super hard not to be depressed. the only time im truly happy is when im around certain people and skelanimals. i wish i could tell the one i love how i feel about him. every time i dont tell him i feel so lame. i want to tell him super bad. i have been talking about this for days. im hestating so mush is because i dont want to get hurt and heartbroken. also, ive come to realize that people do actually care about me. i used to think no one cares about me and i wouldnt believe anyone when they told me that they cared about me. my friends have shown me that they do actually care. also, i have begun fully trusting people. it is very few. i have had trust issues for a long time. i know that theres people that can stab you in the back and yet theres others that wont. lastly, i have finally posted pictures of myself. they are the bottom of my profile.
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